Internally cursing Eve again, I fight the increasing urge to burst into tears / scream / strangle someone / slit my wrists. One would think that with all our modern-day technology and scientific advancements we would have found a cure for PMS! Hormones haywire! Exploding emotions to wrestle down and keep a lid on while trying to hide the fact that anything’s wrong! Just keep outta my way and no one will get hurt – maybe! This bane of women’s (and husbands) lives that rears its ugly head every month, without fail, for decades and decades should be stopped! Now!
Yes, yes, there are some aids to some symptoms and cute packaging but surely someone, somewhere can make it all disappear – for good!
The only improvement I’ve seen recently is those little apps on smart phones that make you want to vomit! Yes, it was bad enough in the “good old days” when this monthly sceptre started creeping up on you and if you could catch a glimpse of it in the shadows early enough it kept you from drowning the cat in tears or kicking your husband. Now, they have an app! It counts down how many days you have to go before all hormones break loose and the whole world tips upside down! That is not a nice feature! It is a horrible thing! Who wants a monthly countdown to chaos? Other than maybe husbands… so they can run away and hide “on a business trip.”
Focus, girl, focus! I pull my mind away from cursing Eve and period apps and focus on my surroundings. Yes, that’s right, I’m in church. We’re singing. I’m singing. Obviously my lips are singing with no mental engagement at all! What are we singing? Focus, don’t cry, focus.
I listen to the words coming from my mouth “I surrender all. I surrender all. All to Jesus, I surrender. I surrender all.” Hmmm, lovely song but really? All? Does Jesus want me to surrender all? Really? Because He can HAVE my PMS!!! I’d freely give Him that!!!
I wonder if that Aussie phrase “She’ll be right mate, coupla days” comes from the horrors of PMS?
Don’t kick the kids! Don’t jump off a bridge! You’ll be right, coupla days! Have some chocolate. Just get home and get some chocolate. You’ll be right, coupla days.
I’ve sent myself to time out. Crazy hormones! It’s better than screaming at the kids. My husband looked so confused and scared when he nodded to my clenched teeth command to “take care of the kids, I’m going to time out!” It was kind of cute! Gee I love him!
Sitting on my bed taking my medicine (chocolate, lots of chocolate), this morning’s song enters my head and interrupts my general PMS cursing. “All to Jesus I surrender.” Hmmm… could I really surrender PMS to Jesus? Would He be interested? Would He take it off me? Don’t cry.
As I pop another chocolate in my mouth I open my Bible and my eyes find this verse “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back” Proverbs 29:11. Although for some reason my eyes read “her feelings” and a “wise woman”.
Hmmm… chocolate… want to scream less… maybe Jesus is interested in my PMS. For many women, the cramps and other icky things are a little more bearable, and definitely easier to hide, but the emotional side of PMS can be difficult. Particularly with mother fatigue, constant housework, insomnia and work pressures. That internal fight of trying to control your feelings when your very hormones want you to lash out at others or sob your soul out can be hard. You know you don’t hate your colleague but try as you might you just can’t get that tone out of your voice and if they just say one more word the tears will escape! Frustration!
At least Proverbs encourages me that not venting my PMS feelings on others is a good thing. But can Jesus do more than that with it if I surrender it to Him? I don’t know but I’d try anything just about now, especially another box of chocolates…
Jesus, I don’t know about this surrendering my PMS to you but I’m willing to try it. So here goes. Jesus – I give you my PMS. Help me to control my feelings and not take them out on others each month. Amen.
Peace. Softly flowing over me. It’s not the chocolate. That ran out several minutes ago. Hmmm… relaxed… feeling like my normal self. Peace, I’ll take more of that…. Hmmm… good… Thanks Jesus! My app tells me to expect a couple of more days of crazy but think I’m going to trust you to give me this peace for the rest of the week.
I bet you’ve never heard a preacher ask you to surrender your PMS to Jesus! It’s not something I’ve ever heard. Yet in ready Philippines 4:6-7 the other day that says “be anxious for nothing, but in everything through prayer …and the peace of God will guard your heart and mind” it occurred to me that Jesus actually is interested in those unspiritual, “minor”, not talked about areas of life, like PMS, allergies, loneliness, image, debt, sex.
Everything means everything. So whatever you’re struggling with today, surrender your anxieties to Jesus and let His peace come into your mind and heart.
PS (for family, friends and colleagues) – this is only made up, you should have noticed I don’t go this crazy each month, I am telling a story to make people think, so before you check my app and then set an “avoid Gail” in your calendar, don’t worry, not hiding needed, I surrendered my PMS to Jesus 😉
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