Screaming: “You’re just an accident! I should never have had you! I should have gone ahead with the abortion! You should thank me that you’re alive!!!”
Tentative: “Honey, I’m pregnant. Surprise?”
Mocking: “You are SO an accident little sibling. Why else are you ten years younger than the rest of us? Mum and Dad NEVER wanted you!”
Shock: “You two are pregnant!?! Already!?!”
I’ve been pondering two TV programs I’ve watched recently. One was “Inside the Human Body” taking viewers on an inside journey from conception to birth. This show explained what an amazing miracle conception is. The odds are not with the sperm. The odds are against conception taking place. The odds make miscarriage likely. Conception, life, is accidental. Or is it?
The second program was “The Seven Ages of Pregnancy”. It debated the “best time” in a woman’s life to get pregnant, from 15 to 46. Pre-career, mid-career, before “you have a life”, after you have “had your life”, when you’re “financially stable”, when you’re too young to “have finances” or when your lifestyle is set on a financial high. This is a significant life question for women, and husbands.
I know women who have:
- chosen to start their family in the first year of marriage having not yet reached their 21st,
- waited until they were financially stable with a house, family car and good job with great maternity leave benefits,
- been married a few years and suddenly realised they’ve hit 30 so better get the family started,
- chose not to have kids but got them anyway,
- had unplanned pregnancy became abortion and heartache,
- tried to have kids but couldn’t get pregnant or couldn’t keep pregnant,
- been desperate for kids waited impatiently for their husband to be ready,
- wanted but can’t have kids because they don’t have a husband.
Which is best? How old our parents are when we are born affects our lives. How much or how little of a surprise we were influences our lives. Not just financially but emotionally, opportunity wise, socially etc.
And with all the questions about timing, with all the odds against conception, with all those babies who come as a surprise, are we all just accidents?
Few lives are created through text-book planning and execution, although I know of a two or three people who were. Mostly conception happens unplanned. So life starting as a surprise is not really a surprise.
Scripture tells us that God knows the number of our days since before creation. He planned the day we were conceived and He knows the day we will die. No one is an accident with Him.
God knows the beginning, the middle and the end. He knows that the year we are born can determine if we are conscripted into an army, what class and teacher we will be in at school, who our friends will, how our education is impacted, if we have little or a lot, what jobs and university places are available to us, even who we date and marry. So many life altering things happen because of when we were conceived and born.
Which family we are born into, which city, which country, which time in history and technology, also impact who were become and how we live our lives.
Yet God knows all of this. He chose the moment and place of our birth. We may not always understand why He placed us where and when He did, but we can be sure that He has it all in control. Life is never an accident to God.
Life is never an accident to God.
In your opinion, do you think there are better times in life for parents to have kids? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
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