“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” Princess Diaries movie
We all have fears in life. Sometimes they build up or disappear over time while others linger throughout our life. Some fears are worth keeping and some are worth fighting. But only we can choose to keep or fight our fears. Only we can judge that something else is more important than our fear. Here’s 5 simple steps to fight your fears:
- Acknowledge that you have a fear. The first step is always to admit there is a problem and maybe, just maybe it’s not normal to be afraid of flying or clowns or eating oranges in spring.
- Assess your fear. This step has 3 parts
- See if you can discover why you are afraid of something e.g. I thought I was scared of heights as a child, until I realised one day at about 9 or 10 that I wasn’t scared of heights but my big sister was and I had just copied her fearful behaviours.
- Ask yourself if you should remove your fear. Some things we are afraid of are good and healthy like the fear of pain. Some are unhealthy like fear of people or germs or trying new things.
- Decide when is a good time to work on fighting your fear. If your fear of flying is preventing you from visiting your grandchildren or hindering your career maybe now is a good time to start fighting it. If you fear bears but live in a city highrise and have three kids under the age of four, maybe now is not the best time in your life to fight this particular fear.
- Ask for help. If it is a great, deeply rooted fear maybe you need professional counselling but if it is something little like fear of changing your routine, friends and family may be able to encourage you as you face this challenge.
- Acquire courage in other areas of life. By building your courage muscles in one area of life you develop the strength to use your courage in the more difficult, scarier parts of life. This is why in confidence building exercises they will take you abseiling or fire walking or bungy jumping so that by building physical and mental courage you are better able to deal with conflict or self-esteem fears.
- Act and face your fears. For some it may be simply holding a cockroach to get rid of their fear for others it may be taking many months taking one more step higher on the ladder every day to get used to heights or changing their self talk. It may take time but with courage, help and persistance you can overcome your fears.
With every step of progress award and praise yourself for your victories as this will help encourage you towards your goal of living a fear free life.
What are some of the fears you have conquered in life? Did you use similar steps to these or others?
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